By Sierra Nye
Enrolling at Southern Virginia University (SVU) ranks as my second most impactful decision, closely following the joyous occasion of marrying the love of my life — whom I fortuitously met during our time at SVU. Being married has enriched my life in every way, being able to spend everyday with my best friend, attending all our classes together, never having to say goodbye. It’s so fun to be a part of every aspect of life with the one you love. While my time at this institution has been marked by cherished memories, the post-marriage phase has revealed discernible differences in the university social experience.
This is dedicated to exploring the experiences of married students at Southern Virginia University and addressing the evident lack of support and resources available to them on campus. Specifically examining housing, community activities, religious support, and the absence of dedicated representation within the university, the study aims to uncover the multifaceted challenges faced by married students. Situated in Buena Vista, Virginia, SVU is recognized for fostering a close-knit community grounded in the principles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Notably, the campus is characterized by a significant presence of married students, contributing to the rich tapestry of its student body. This demographic reflects the university’s dedication to accommodating individuals at various stages of life, from traditional undergraduates to those navigating the dual responsibilities of marriage and academia. In an environment where faith-based values intersect with academic pursuits, SVU’s emphasis on inclusivity should extend to the unique needs and experiences of its married student population, a distinctive aspect that adds depth to the vibrant community that defines the university. However, within this institution, the experiences of married students have often been overshadowed by the prevailing focus on the unmarried undergraduate life.
My overarching goal is to illuminate the unique needs and concerns of married students at SVU, advocating for a more inclusive and supportive campus environment. Married students contribute to over 15% of the SVU student population. By unraveling the intricacies of their experiences, the aim is to contribute valuable insights that can inform institutional policies, enhance existing support systems, and ultimately cultivate an atmosphere where married students feel acknowledged, empowered, and equipped to thrive both academically and personally.
Understanding and addressing the challenges faced by married students within a university environment is a critical step toward fostering a truly inclusive educational ecosystem. The absence of dedicated married housing, limited religious support, and a dearth of organized activities not only create substantial hurdles for these students, but also jeopardize their overall well-being and academic success. The intertwining of marital commitments with the rigors of higher education demands a nuanced understanding of the unique needs that arise from this dual responsibility. By comprehending and actively addressing these challenges, universities can contribute to the holistic development of their student body, ensuring that married students are not only academically engaged but also emotionally supported in their pursuit of knowledge.
In recent years, many liberal arts universities have increasingly recognized the unique needs of married students within higher education. A growing body of literature has shed light on the experiences of married students, emphasizing the importance of tailored support to enhance their overall well-being and academic success. Many liberal arts institutions have taken proactive measures to address the specific challenges faced by married students by offering comprehensive support systems.
One significant aspect of this support revolves around housing options. Several universities, BYU, University of Utah, Washington and Lee, University of Virginia, University of Michigan, and so many more, have developed housing programs specifically catering to married students, acknowledging the distinct requirements of couples and families. These accommodations often go beyond traditional dormitories, providing family-friendly living spaces that foster a sense of community. Successful models have integrated elements like communal spaces for families to interact, childcare facilities, and programming tailored to the unique needs of married students. With the majority of our student body having traveled to get here, they come from a place where they might be used to the idea of university married housing. So it brings up a question that most people would start to consider when discussing university options. Why should they stay at SVU when other universities, maybe closer to home, offer more support and guidance for their situation?
Universities are increasingly focusing on inclusive activities that consider the diverse interests and responsibilities of married students. Recognizing that these students may have additional commitments beyond their academic pursuits, institutions have developed a range of extracurricular programs that are family-friendly. From parenting workshops to family-oriented social events, these initiatives aim to create a supportive community that acknowledges and celebrates the diversity of the student body. Brigham Young University does a great job at this, and one option that they provide is doing a getaway for their married students. The Aspen Grove Getaway is a time where married couples can go to the mountains and spend quality time together, they have inspriring speakers and wholesome recreational activities. This shows the married students that BYU understands the importance of marriage, and they are providing resources and ways for their students marriages to continue to thrive and grow.
Religious activities also play a crucial role in the support system for married students. Many universities recognize the significance of religious and spiritual practices in the lives of all their students, and they actively facilitate religious activities on campus. Especially here at Southern Virginia University, being aligned with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This inclusivity not only contributes to the overall well-being of married students, but also fosters a sense of belonging within the university community. There are so many changes that happen when you first get married and it is important that church can act as a place of refuge. A place where you can feel comfortable and safe.
“Attendance and activity in a church help us become better people and better influences on the lives of others. In church we are taught how to apply religious principles. We learn from one another. A persuasive example is more powerful than a sermon. We are strengthened by associating with others of like minds. In church attendance and participation, our hearts are, as the Bible says, knit together in love”. — President Dallin H. Oaks
It is cruical that within the religious bounds, if someone wants to attend church, that we provide a comfortable space for them to do so.
It is also evident that addressing housing concerns, promoting inclusive activities, acknowledging religious needs, and ensuring representation are pivotal in cultivating an environment where married students can thrive both academically and personally. As universities continue to evolve, the implementation of such support structures is vital in fostering a more inclusive and accommodating higher education experience for married students.
It seemed like SVU was lagging behind many other liberal arts institutions, but is it just my bias? I decided to dive deeper into the experience of students at SVU to find out…
Housing
Among the topics frequently discussed by married students at SVU, one of the prominent concerns is the absence of university-provided housing for young married couples. Housing arrangements at a university are undoubtedly complex, involving various considerations, and it is not a simple task to magically create housing options. Historically, SVU did offer married housing through the Gayle Smith apartments on campus. However, a significant change occurred this year when the housing department repurposed the Gayle Smith apartments for non-married students, eliminating any designated housing for married couples among the other SVU’s housing options for single students, including The Lofts, Robey, Craton, Walnut, Carriage Townhomes, Carriage Mods, Library Mods, and Gayle Smith. This shift in focus towards single students is glaring.
SVU faces a below-average retention rate, standing at 69%, resulting in the loss of around 40 students per 100 going into their sophomore year. The declining retention rate over the years emphasizes the importance of concentrating efforts on upperclassmen, who significantly contribute to the school’s graduation rate of 29%. Admissions at SVU have also seen a decline, with a drop in enrollment from over 1,100 students after Covid-19 to just under 1,000 students in the Fall of 2023.
Numerous married students have voiced their need for housing assistance, but the availability of off-campus housing options for married couples is limited. A nearby apartment complex at the bottom of the hill can only accommodate 14 married couples, making approval challenging. The remaining married students must depend on members of the Buena Vista community for housing alternatives, such as renting basements or other properties. However, married students find themselves again in direct competition with single students for these off-campus options. Community members, offering rentals, typically prioritize single SVU students to maximize occupancy and charge higher rent, creating an unfavorable situation for young married couples.
In the local Facebook group (#svuwhere), members of the BV and SVU community collaborate to find housing options. Unfortunately, the search ratio is heavily skewed, with a 7 to 1 preference for single students over married couples. Even within the BV community, single students have a greater likelihood of securing off-campus housing compared to married couples. Some options available for married couples include apartments or, in certain cases, spare rooms within a homeowner’s residence. However, this setup often involves sharing living spaces with the owner, an arrangement that may not align with the preferences of newly married couples. Despite the less-than-ideal nature of these living arrangements, the severe housing shortage leaves limited options, forcing some couples into circumstances they would prefer to avoid, further highlighting the perceived favoritism towards non-married students.
I asked a couple questions with a housing representative in the housing department to get some answers and clarity on what we are all thinking. April Harris helped shed light on the situation. While acknowledging the less-than-ideal nature of the circumstances, she emphasized the university’s commitment to SVU’s best interests.
Continuing my conversation with the housing department, they shared that they have some requirements to qualify to live off campus.
“SVU does have a housing policy, requiring single students to be over the age of 21, have over 56 credit hours, and previously live on campus for two terms”.
This acts as an incentive in efforts to keep the single students predominantly on campus. However, again, the below-average retention rate for underclassmen indicates this isn’t working best for them. There are exceptions for some students who don’t meet these requirements, and you can find students who don’t meet the off campus requirements still living off campus. So while the school might say they try to keep underclassman or unmarried students on campus, there is nothing truly holding this accountable. Once again adding to an underlying issue that needs attention.
April Harris conveyed the university’s desire to reintroduce married student housing in the future, with the “President’s Leadership Council considering both single and married students in planning and budgeting for housing projects.” While SVU aims to assist married or engaged couples in finding housing through available resources, the current issue requires stronger consideration and addressal, especially as SVU anticipates further growth. Ultimately, it remains crucial to more strongly consider and address this problem, especially given the anticipated growth of SVU, making it an increasingly pressing issue. Addressing these concerns now may influence the Leadership Council to prioritize married housing options in the university’s future developments.
I do want to emphasize that the housing issues are not just an issue here within SVU, no matter what university you go to, or where you live, there will always be situations that could be considered less than ideal. I acknowledge that this issue is common but that shouldn’t take away from recognizing and acting on a much needed change.
Young Married Ward
SVU stands out prominently due to its affiliation with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, shaping our identity and values. At SVU, a notable aspect is the commitment to high standards, with a focus on emulating the teachings of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Each year, numerous SVU students embark on full-time missions for the church, demonstrating our dedication. The Young Single Adult (YSA) wards, led by exceptional leadership, play a pivotal role in nurturing the testimonies of our student body, fostering a supportive community where members can lean on one another for guidance. Ministering has become integral to our daily lives, facilitating meaningful connections.
My experience in YSA wards deepened my appreciation for the relief society and the ministering program. Through assigned ministering responsibilities, I formed a lasting friendship with someone I might not have connected with otherwise. Ministering within SVU fosters meaningful relationships, contributing to the trust within the ward. This trust, in turn, enhances the Sunday services, creating an environment free from judgment where personal stories can be shared comfortably.
However, some SVU students express concerns about transitioning to family wards, where they feel a lack of connection and support. The initial years of marriage are crucial for personal and spiritual growth, and inadequate support in family wards can pose challenges. Attendees should ideally feel welcomed, equal, and supported in their own ward, but unfortunately, some experience the opposite. Interactions with professors in a church setting can be perceived as hierarchical, undermining the sense of equality.
Acknowledging these concerns, there is a growing desire among SVU students for the establishment of a young married ward. Such a ward would provide a supportive community for those in similar circumstances, fostering bonding moments and building trust among members. The proposed young married ward would still benefit from strong priesthood leadership while offering additional leadership opportunities and callings for its members, opportunities that are not provided in the family wards.
A fellow SVU student who has been married for almost two years emphasizes the importance of meaningful callings, stating that it would benefit young people and reduce the turnover of “temporary members” in family wards. The disconnect between family ward members and young married students arises from the perception of the latter as temporary members until graduation.
A recent change within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, regarding wards and stake sizes just recently came out. Here the church updated our current policy for creating and changing unit boundaries. On November 30, 2023 the First Presidency of the church announced the updated standards for ward and stake boundaries. Elder Christofferson said that a reason the church was organized was to…
“give us experience in loving others, to learn what being motivated by charity means in practice.”
The new changes are that stakes and wards can now in a sense be smaller. Previously you needed 3,000 members to be a stake, now you only need 1,900–2,000, depending on the country. They also made an adjustment for ward sizes as well. The First Presidency then urged that our leaders should use the new minimum requirements outlined when proposing boundaries. They expect these changes to show in early 2024. This change really helps the situation here in Buena Vista, as a concern that we hear is that we don’t have the numbers to make the young married ward. It was argued that we did have enough members to properly make a ward, or even a branch. But now, following the updated church policy, we now have enough to make sure we fill the requirements to have our own ward within the family stake, or the student stake.
Now, as I was looking into these different ideas and concepts I did come across a quote again from Elder Christofferson which had a humbling effect on me.
“We don’t choose a congregation based on who we like or want to be with. Wards are chosen for us based on a reasonable geographic alignment, and we learn to live with, serve, and love people who might well be different in background, preferences, and opinions.”
Which I do 100% agree with. Moving forward in life, we might each find ourselves in positions or places where we might not fully love our ward, but that is the ward we are supposed to serve in. The reason we attend church is to take the sacrament and continue to grow and strengthen our testimonies. And I do awknowledge that making and creating a ward is done through priesthood authority and needs the proper approval from the Church. However I also know that creating a young married ward is not a novel concept within the Church, as other universities like BYU, University of Utah, BYU-Idaho, UVU, and BYU-Hawaii have successfully implemented this model. Buena Vista, Virginia, with its substantial SVU active married student population, is poised to benefit from a young married ward, serving as an ideal transition point from YSA wards to family wards after graduation. There are a significant amount of students on campus that feel they would benefit from having a young married ward, and we urge the priesthood members who hold those keys to ponder and pray over this wanted change.
Activities
“Bring back date nights!!!” — Braylie Green
Many married students at SVU find themselves facing a dearth of activities tailored to their needs, a gap that hampers their sense of community and engagement with the university environment. The current set of activities hosted by SVU seems to overlook the unique dynamics and schedules that married students contend with, leaving them with limited opportunities to participate. This lack of tailored engagement can create a sense of isolation and hinder the development of meaningful relationships among married students.
Due to the limited entertainment options in our small town, it is imperative that SVU to host date nights, providing students with engaging activities and opportunities to connect. These SVU date nights in the past gained notoriety for sparking everlasting romances or providing a delightful evening for already married couples. In a February 2022 article released by SVU, dating experiences of alumni were shared, highlighting instances where their love stories began at SVU date night activities. One particularly heartwarming story recounted a chance meeting during an Institute-hosted speed dating event. These campus date nights, deemed irreplaceable, offer students a valuable opportunity to connect with their peers. Even for married couples, it serves as an incentive to continue dating, rekindling the honeymoon flame and alleviating the stresses associated with school and work. Without thoughtfully curated activities, married couples might refrain from participating in current school events, deeming them inappropriate. As one individual expressed…
“Attending the bubble or paint block parties hosted by SVU would be an uncomfortable situation for a husband or wife — surrounded by single students, drenched in bubbles and paint.”
The absence of inclusive activities has an adverse effect on the overall campus atmosphere. Married students may feel detached from the broader student body, as the existing events may not align with their priorities or lifestyles. Someone from Arizona State University said “the relationships your student makes in college can contribute to their personal, academic, and professional success.” Building strong relationships with peers is a crucial aspect of the college experience that can help our students perform better academically as well as in any of our extra curricular activities. SVU needs to address this gap to ensure that all students, regardless of marital/relationship status, feel included and connected within the university and community. Implementing activities that accommodate the specific needs of married students would not only enhance their experience, but also contribute to a more vibrant and supportive campus environment.
These all carry significant ramifications for SVU’s policies and practices regarding the support of married students. It becomes evident that a more intentional approach is required to address the unique needs of this demographic within the university community. The current challenges faced by married students in terms of housing, community engagement, religious activities, and representation underscore the necessity for policy adjustments. Recognizing the importance of holistic well-being for academic success, SVU could consider revising its housing strategies, providing dedicated spaces for married students to create a supportive and conducive living environment. They also could start hosting activities that are tailored to the married demographic, to help us feel as though we belong and are wanted here at SVU.
Recommendations for creating a more inclusive and supportive atmosphere for married students extend beyond housing adjustments. SVU should actively promote community events that specifically cater to the needs and interests of married students, fostering a sense of camaraderie and shared experiences. Facilitating religious spaces for the married couples would strengthen the spiritual well-being of these students and contribute to a sense of belonging within the university’s faith-based community. Additionally, ensuring proper representation of married students in decision-making processes and within campus organizations is vital for addressing their concerns effectively. By incorporating these recommendations into SVU’s policies and practices, the university can proactively enhance the overall experience and success of its married student population, creating an environment that truly supports their academic and personal growth.
The experiences of married students at Southern Virginia University reveal a nuanced and often overlooked aspect of university life. As this exploration delves into the challenges faced by married students in terms of housing, community engagement, religious activities, and representation, it becomes clear that SVU’s policies and practices need a more intentional and inclusive approach.
The absence of dedicated housing for married students presents a pressing concern, with a current housing shortage leaving many couples in less-than-ideal living situations. The transition from Young Single Adult wards to family wards, while a natural progression, has highlighted a need for additional support and community-building initiatives tailored to the unique circumstances of married students. The call for the establishment of a young married ward echoes the experiences of other universities and could provide a supportive bridge between YSA and family wards.
The lack of inclusive activities for married students underscores the importance of creating a campus environment that acknowledges and accommodates the diverse needs of its student body. Date nights and other events specifically designed for married couples can foster a sense of belonging and connection, contributing to the overall well-being and success of these students.
Religious support, a cornerstone of SVU’s identity, should extend its embrace to married students, providing them with a spiritual refuge and a sense of community within the faith-based environment. The recent changes in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints regarding ward sizes may offer a timely opportunity for SVU to reevaluate its ward structure and consider the establishment of a young married ward.
As SVU anticipates further growth, it is crucial for the university to actively address the concerns of its married student population. Recommendations for dedicated housing, tailored activities, and enhanced religious support, coupled with representation in decision-making processes, can contribute to a more inclusive and supportive atmosphere. By incorporating these insights into its policies and practices, SVU has the potential to not only retain its married student population but also to foster an environment where they can thrive both academically and personally.
I have loved every moment I have had here at SVU. It has been a place of so much growth for myself and I know I am not alone. I have met the greatest people and am continually surrounded by the most uplifting peers and friends. I also am blessed to have amazing professors, advisors, support, colleagues, and leaders. During my time here I have learned more about myself and grown confident in who I am and what I stand for. I made a decision to serve a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which prior to my time here at SVU I did not think was going to be a part of my plan. I have dedicated many hours into my education, one that is so profound and one that I know will enrich me and bring so many blessings throughout my life. The connections I have made have allowed me to connect with so many other people, in ways that no other university could have done. And most importantly, I met the wonderful man that I’ve chosen to spend all eternity with. And for that I will forever be grateful for SVU. Southern Virginia University is a wonderful place where relationships can be made and grown, a place of refuge, with many opportunities. The things that I talked about today would only help and enrich the experiences of those who attend SVU, and help make this place even better.
In essence, this exploration serves as a call to action for SVU to embrace the unique needs of its married students, recognizing that a more intentional and inclusive approach will not only benefit this demographic but also contribute to the overall vibrancy and success of the university community.
Examining the Challenges Faced by Married Students at Southern Virginia University was originally published in The Herald on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.