By Severio Martin
I’ve thought about this question a lot. Instead of just giving you my opinion, I’ve asked others what a good friend is to them. Here are the answers given by many other people about friendship.
“I think signs that someone is a good friend are that they keep you in the forefront of their minds and want to include you in their social circle,” says Hayden Mortensen (‘22).
I like the idea of a good friend being inclusive. In life, you will always have different things competing for your attention. Time is the only thing we truly own.
“They are willing to give themselves for you and they strive to help you feel acknowledged and appreciated. A good friend also genuinely connects with you and will have your back because of that connection,” adds Mortensen.
Having good friends is important, but so is maintaining those quality friendships.
“If you feel like you’re the only one putting forth effort in the friendship, talk to them about it. One of the worst things in the world is a friendship breakup, but sometimes in order to find a good friend, you have to sift through the bad ones. Then repeat the process as necessary,” advises Brooklyn Porter (‘21).
On a more positive note, the scripture St. John 15:13 shares:
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”
“…In order to find a good friend, you have to be a good friend. Ask them how they are doing, invite them to things, spend time with them and get to know them, bond over guys/girls, sports, food, etc. And just like in any relationship, communication is important. Talk to them, open up, ask them for advice, but also listen to their struggles and problems,” says Porter.
I’ve asked several people about their definition of friendship, but ultimately, here’s mine:
My definition of a good friend is being there for someone, even when you do not necessarily have the time to make that sacrifice.
It takes time and effort to be a good friend, in addition to good communication. Let them know if you’re not going to be at events or activities because you’re working more or studying for the LSAT. It’s okay to not see your friends, but it’s not okay to never communicate why. Not communicating leaves room for assumption between friends.
I have a solid group of friends I have spent time with while here at Southern Virginia University. As school gets busier we have spent less time together. But we still get together on Sundays for Come Follow Me, and fun activities.
So make an effort.
Good Friends: Where to find them and how to be one! was originally published in The Herald on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
